Confederacy of a Dunce - Bachelor Partying

Thursday, October 06, 2005

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Last night I went to a small, low-key bachelor party for a friend of mine who's getting married tomorrow. And all manner of hilarity ensued. Here are just a few of the things that happened.*

... The bride and her friends dressed up like prostitutes in order to spy on the groom, but accidentally found themselves in a room full of Japanese businessmen, with predictable consequences.

... A donkey died from a drug overdose. What's funnier than that?

... A naked man fell out of a hotel window and fell through the roof of a car, right between a couple who were just about to kiss. Whoops!

... Someone with a gun was trying to shoot the guests.

... The groom ended up fighting with the bride's ex in a movie theater. But as the film was being shown in 3d, the audience thought it was just part of the show.

... A nerd fell in love with a transvestite; much hilarity ensued when he discovered the secret.

*When I say "happened", I mean "happened in the 1984 film "Bachelor Party" (starring Tom Hanks, Tawny Kitaen and, errr, Adrian Zmed)", and not in last night's bachelor party which would surely not make a rollicking, good-time movie that stands the test of time. It is a travesty that "Amadeus" received the 1984 Best Picture Oscar, and that "Bachelor Party" was not even nominated. Did "Killing Fields" have any donkey overdoses? Did "A Passage to India" have any fights in movie theaters?! Did "A Soldier's Story" have any characters named "Nick the Dick"? And don't even get me started about "Places in the Heart" and its lack of comedy scenes involving prostitution.

consume

Thursday, October 06, 2005 11:42:41 AM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)